What I Want

For so long, I have been trying to do everything for everybody. I have been trying to be everything that they would need in life just for the simple satisfaction of making someone happy. And as much as I absolutely love to do that, I'm so tired of it. I want somebody to do something for me, just because they know it would put me in a good mood. Not because someone told them to, not because I asked, not because it seems like the right thing to do, but just because they want to. I come into peoples lives hoping to improve it or to be a simple solution to some problems they may be having. I allow myself to connect with people to try to do something good for them, so why do I always end up getting hurt or something of that sort? Well that is the kind of thing that I am so tired of. I don't want to be a problem to people, I want to be a solution. So just let me say this, if I am a problem to any of you, please feel free to address me about it so I can withdraw myself from your life to prevent any future issues. I don't want to be someone people think badly of, I don't want to be someone people feel sorry for. I want people to be able to proudly point me out in the crowd and say, "That is one of my best friends." I want someone to treat me like a person and want to have me around. I don't just want people to come to me all the time and me not be able to go back to them when I need a friend. I am human, I do have struggles. As much as I try to mask them, they are there, and I want someone to press me to talk about them. As much as I wish I could, I can't face this world alone, I need mutual friendships, I need people that care about me and want to see me happy just because they do. And now that I have made myself seem like a needy self-centered person, I will close this blog before further damage is done. Thank you to anyone who has had the decency to read this. It truly means the world to me. So much that you could never really understand.